What does waiting on God look like in your singleness?
Check out this blog and interview from Joshua Dillard’s wife Veronica Dillard! She releases her new blog BlessedIsShe.me on July 1st, make sure you connect with her, she’s a gem!
[shadowbox]Check it below[/shadowbox]
Sometimes I think we Christians have this whole dating and marriage thing a little misconstrued. Recently, I’ve listened to a few conversations where people have shared their thoughts on dating in the Christian world. The resounding theme has been simply pursue a common interest you have with someone and make it work if you so desire. So basically, choose and make it happen.
My issue with this stance? I don’t see how this separates us from the world. Who doesn’t simply pursue an interest with someone in order to see if it will work out? That’s the basic premise of what our culture stands on. Test it out and if you like it, ride with it. But even if you state your intentions from the beginning, even if both parties know it’s nothing serious at the moment, who’s to say someone still won’t get hurt? Who’s to say feelings won’t be developed on either side? Who’s to say that after spending time with someone with intentions to get to know him or her that a connection won’t form, a connection that might be hard to walk away from if the feelings and desires are not mutual?
I just don’t believe that’s the way God intended for us to do relationships. His will and His ways are perfect. The last time I checked, someone ending up hurt or upset is not perfect. I also know that God is not the author of confusion. So if this method leads to confusion, pain and disappointment, then it can’t be God, right?
So what do I think?
[shadowbox]Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. (Matthew 6:33 NLT)[/shadowbox]
[shadowbox]Fear the LORD, you his godly people, for those who fear him will have all they need. Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the LORD will lack no good thing. (Psalms 34:9-10 NLT)[/shadowbox]
[shadowbox]Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart’s desires. (Psalms 37:4 NLT)[/shadowbox]
I think the first thing is to find contentment in Christ. Before we seek a relationship, before we start looking for a husband or a wife, we have to first find joy and fulfillment in Christ alone. If we cannot be satisfied on our own, if we are not a complete individual then a relationship or marriage will not satisfy us either. Satisfaction and contentment comes from Christ. If we do not allow Him to make us whole and ensure us that we are ready prior to a relationship, we will actually be a disservice to our partner.
We have to seek His kingdom first, delight ourselves in Him, fear Him and allow Him to work in us and THEN all that other “stuff” will be added unto us. We will not want for anything. No good thing will He withhold from us. No good thing. And if you ask me, marriage is a good thing. I truly believe that only once we find contentment in Christ are we in a place where He can add to out lives.
I think prayer shouldn’t be the last thing we do in regards to determining if a relationship is right for us but it should be the first and continuous thing we do. The Bible tells is to pray without ceasing. Interested in someone? Pray about it. Desire to pursue someone? Pray about it. Thinking about marrying someone? Pray about it. And wait for your answer. Wait for confirmation. Be still and listen.
We pray for everything else, why not pray about this?
After deciding to follow Christ, marriage is probably the second biggest decision you will ever make. Is that a decision you are really willing to leave in your own hands? Are we so dependent on ourselves and our own conscious abilities that we choose not to rely on God in this area?
If we ask, God will answer. That’s His promise.
Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come. (Jeremiah 33:3 NLT)
When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own but will tell you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future. (John 16:13 NLT)
“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. (Matthew 7:7-8 NLT)
I really believe that God meets us at our level of expectancy.
If we expect Him to show up, He will. If we expect Him to answer, He will.
All in His perfect timing.
Isn’t that what faith is? Believing that the One who is able, can AND will?
So why not ask? Why not try Him? Why not invite Him to do the searching or weeding out for you?
I did. And I’ve never been so sure about anything else in my life other than my faith. I was in a place where I was okay with it being just me and God. He was my lover. He was my friend. He was my everything. (He still is, by the way.) And one day, He began speaking to me about my husband and continued to do so until He brought him to me.
When you allow God to write your love story, you will find fulfillment, joy and peace in knowing that the Author of life faultlessly crafted every detail of who you are to be in perfect harmony with every detail of who your mate is.
And trust me, there’s no disappointment or confusion when you follow God’s lead.
Let Him tell you when you’re ready.
Let Him show you the way.
Let Him open your eyes to love
I promise you won’t be disappointed.